The Outsider. August 19, 2015.

August 19, 2015

Hello my beautiful friends and family! It’s been a few days, I’m totally aware so I apologize. But Mom and I have been busy here in Seattle! I am determined to change my perspective and find the aspect of Seattle that makes people adore the city. I think we are onto something! We explored downtown a little bit, we even took the trolley like true locals. Then we went and had dinner with the Sliker family. Such a nice, warm, and welcoming family and the food was so good! I’m still trying to recover a bit from that last surgery, the incision marks and inside my stomach feel kind of like one big bruise. It’s definitely not unbearable but it is something that bothers me a bit. Today we went to this adorable little park called Green Lake Park. Mom and I have a mutual love for people watching so we enjoyed that for a solid hour. We were looking for a church to go to on Sunday and Mom thought about a Wednesday night service. Well I found a college group that looked promising, so yeah I was that girl who brought her Mom to college group. Hey she has no shame and she actually liked it!

On that note, I’m back to community. From elementary to high school, to college, to churches, to camps, to Europe, to Spokane, the Lord has been faithful to provide me with a solid community everywhere I go. As I walked into the college group I had a little anxiety, I mean a new place, a new city, and you know you’re an outsider. One thing I feel like the Lord is always trying to remind me is that I’m actually not an outsider. That’s a label we put on ourselves. ESPECIALLY if you are joining a Christian community that has been united by the belief in the same God. We are brothers and sisters so I am trying to challenge my perspective and get involved. As I sat there listening to them talk to one another, watching them worship, watching them pray for each other, I got a sinking gut feeling that I recognized this community. I looked around and saw the Nickels from Klamath, and the twins from Texas, I saw the Fusion group from Germany, I saw Garett and Collin from Moody, I could go on and on. At first the realization brought me down, here I was feeling sad that those people from my old communities were no longer there, these people before me don’t know me and I’m not 100% myself. I started to pray that the Lord would help me trust in His faithfulness. Every new situation starts out uncomfortable. The Lord then gave me this notion, “What if this community isn’t here for me? Instead what if I’m here for this community?” Wow. This has rocked my perspective guys. It has moved the spotlight from me and my needs to them. How can I contribute? How can I serve? How can I help make this community tight knit and Christ centered? How can I be a resource of the Lord and use my gifts and talents, or even my current trial to help this community? And in that selflessness what can I learn from them? It’s not about my comfort, or insecurity because I may not be best friends. I am a Sister in Christ to them and wherever the Lord sends me I can go confidently knowing that His people will always be there. So after reading today's post my challenge to you is to check your perspective. Are you an outsider? Is that keeping you from seeking community, following Christ, volunteering, or making new friends? How does God see you? And do you need to work on not making others feel like an outsider? Just some food for thought, love ya! 

Quick update: There is no update! I was supposed to have the test results on Monday after surgery, it is now Wednesday and I have nothing. So the Stage 4 vs. Stage 3B feud continues on and I will let you know when I know!